We are the Keepers of the Cough. In so being, we also maintain the sacred social distancing wherein lie the simple truths of the 6-foot distancing cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our homes to maintain and endorse these strongly-urged guidelines.
The Rules lie at the beginning of Flattening the Curve, not at the apex. Learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them all into your life as a non-Covidiot is a never-ending struggle waged between sneeze and fever as we continue along The Path towards staying the fuck home.
See also The CDC Prayer.
Rule #1 // Obey the strongly-urged guidelines.
Rule #2 // Lead by Example.
Rule #3 // Sit the fuck down.
Rule #4 // Set up your trainer and your legs will follow.
Rule #5 // Sit on your porch in your cycling gear to cultivate razor-sharp tan lines.
Rule #6 // If you are out riding in bad weather, you better keep a six-foot gap between you and other riders.
Rule #7 // You never get closer, you just stay the fuck away from other riders.
Rule #8 // Quarantine with the bike. Not family.
Rule #9 // If you get sick, stay in.
